gotta a lot on my mind….

now to get it on paper or keyboard sometime soon? Who knows we’ll see!

Lesson Learned

So I’m not sure really how to start this post. I made a huge blunder in life recently! I mean BIG…I am not going to get into the details on it, but trust me, if I did it to you, there would be problems between me and you. I felt horrible after I did it! It’s one of those things that you kick yourself over and over for, and worst of all, it impacts relationships you have for a really long time. I hate those mess ups in life. The hardest part is to move on. You can ask for forgiveness from people and they can say yes, but truth be told, there is a long period before things ever go back to “normal”. With some people things never go back to “normal”. So, in the midst of it all I can say I learned my lesson, so to speak. I hate how sometimes in life you struggle and struggle with the same “pit” over and over. It’s so frustrating, the funny thing is as I went through this it helped me to realize just a little bit more about the love of my Saviour. As I was hurting because of the stunt I pulled (which is crazy because in all actuality it’s the other person who hurts, but somehow guilt makes you feel crazy awful) anyway, at one point, my son, who has no idea what was going on inside of me, comes to me, out of the clear blue, and says “mom, I love you”. Wow!!! I needed to hear that! I needed that so much. Then I started thinking to myself, oh man, one day, Aidan or Cameron is going to find themselves in a situation where they feel awful about themselves and what they did. Ouch! I can’t even stand to think of that day! Then I thought, how I hope they come to me, because, truth be told, there is NOTHING and I mean NOTHING they can do to make me love them any less. I would just want to hold them, and listen to them, and let them cry in my arms. I would just want to comfort them! So that leads me to this thought. Actually a couple thoughts:

1. Sometimes a child no matter how old, needs their mom or dad
2. Amazing to me the love a parent has for their child and how it’s never changing no matter what is done in life (don’t think you really get this until you have children).
3. If a parental love on this earth (which is full of sin and distress) is this strong how much stronger and bigger and mammoth is the love of our Heavenly Father for us? I mean He is perfect love!

Okay, that third one got me good! That’s crazy! He loves me! He loves you! He loves my kids, and your kids, and your parents, and your siblings! He loves us more than we could ever even begin to imagine! That’s crazy, that’s awesome, that’s huge! I know Him personally, He is my heavenly Father, and I have His love ALL of the time!

The Waiting Game

Ever sit by the phone and wait for someone to call you? I am absolutely, positively, by no chance, one of those people. If people say they’re going to call me and they don’t I usually don’t mind at all. Matter in fact, I usually don’t even think about it again. There are a very few things in life that I truly can’t just let roll of my back, so to speak. I’m not a girl to hold grudges, I’m not a girl to get my hopes up much, I’m not a girl who sits and plays the waiting game with anyone really. Except for lately! I can’t say I’m sitting and waiting (cuz we all know I have two young kids), but I can say that I’ve gotten my hopes up. I think in the back of my head to myself “yeah, they’ll do it, they’ll come through, I just know they will. I mean they said it with their own lips”. The truth is, since I don’t usually get hung up on this stuff, when it finally happens and I do wait for a call, it kills me on the inside. I don’t necessarily begrudge the person who said it, but I get mad at myself for allowing this to happen! Life is crazy, it’s short, there’s so much that needs to be done, so why worry about someone who doesn’t come through? Honestly, why wait? I have to move on, I know I do, it’s just hard.

Wonder how God feels sometimes? Is he sitting by playing “the waiting game” for me, or for us? Man, I hope not! Today’s the day, I need to check myself! Am I playing that with God? Cuz it sure doesn’t feel good playing it with others, so I best not be playing it with Him! Are youplaying “the waiting game”? Are you leaving Him in the dust? Cuz He won’t play “the waiting game” for long. After all, life is too short, if we’re not willing to move in life for Him, He’s gonna go find someone else to do business for Him! Lord, may I allow You to use me to Your fullest potential, the potential that You planned me to be. May I not leave you waiting for me, use me to fulfill Your plans. Amen. On that note, stop waiting and just do it, I know I will. Have a great day

Is it a bird? Is it a plane?

No, it’s the sun!!! Oh my goodness, looks like it’s gonna be first beautiful day in a LONG time! Too bad I’m working all day, bummer! But to all of you who are off today and to my beautiful children, enjoy the day! Wish I was doing this today!

Back to Work

Alright, so last week I had the entire week off from work…not a good thing financially at all, but God works in mysterious ways. It turns out Aidan ended up extremely sick with a double ear infection and mild pneumonia. And of course, we were able to confirm my little man has pretty extreme asthma. It seems I only pass my crumby traits onto him, you know, like eczema, asthma, loudness in speaking….all that kind of stuff. So anyway, it worked out well, my boss isn’t fond of people taking time off for things like sickness especially if it’s for my children and not for myself. So, I was able to stay home and tend to my boy all last week and not have to worry at all about the stability of my position at work! I love when God works things like this out! Aidan is now feeling much better, it’s amazing what an antibiotic will do (although I hate the fact he has to be on them, they are quite miraculous)…now I hold my breath and pray that my little girl will not get the same cold and have it settle in her ears or chest! So tomorrow I return to work with a busy week ahead of me. Can I just say, I understand I’m in a place in life where I must work, but oh how I LOVE (and that is the understatement of a lifetime) to be home with my family Have a great Monday everyone…see you sometime, I’m not guaranteeing soon, but just sometime!

Attention young girls/women looking for solid advice

I found this today on a blog I follow regularly, check it out if you want to!
NOTE: It costs $3.99 to download, but I think it’s pretty cool

- A few years ago Beth Moore did a Living Proof Live event for young women. At that event there was a Q&A with Beth, Christy Nockels and Melissa Moore (now Fitzpatrick). You can download the Q&A right here; if you’re in college and career ministry OR if you’re a young woman who values some solid advice and wisdom, the Q&A is a fantastic resource.

lunch break anyone?

It’s Monday, as if that’s not hard enough? I got to spend my lunch with the Crest Lady for the Connecticut area. Learning about new toothbrushes and what is best for my patients! Talk about a long day! Good thing that “24″ is on tonight!

Monday Morning already?

here’s how we started our week. It was a long weekend for the kids, so today is going to be a day of laying back and relaxing. They crack me up!

Splinters and eczema

What a long week for the Larkin household. Monday night we put the kids to bed and all seemed to be well…then Tuesday morning came. Cameron woke up and Aidan ran into her room to give her the usual wake up head rub. Then I came in to take her out of her cage, otherwise known as a crib. I brought her into our room, cuz that’s just what we do in our house, we all start our morning together in mom and dad’s room! I looked at her hand and noticed this gross infection. Here are the signs of infection:
redness
swelling
heat
pain
Cameron had all 4 on her hand, it was crazy and their was even a green bubble full of puss in case we were completely naive parents, which we aren’t in this department. I had to work, so Michael got the lucky job of taking her to the pediatrician. But, it’s a package deal cuz we have two kids, so when one has to go, the other gets to come along for the ride. Imagine the joy of taking two kids to the pediatrician. It’s what a guy in his thirties lives for! They got there and were lucky enough to wait for 20 minutes in the waiting room. Let me back up and explain how they said, make sure he comes early, which got him nowhere. I’m pretty sure they have a hidden camera in the waiting room and tell all parents to come early in hopes to win the $10,000 prize on America’s funniest video. Truth be told, even though it’s a pediatric office they have a total of 4 toys in the waiting room, and 3 books (which we have read about 37 times since we started going there). Needless to say, the kids could care less about the toys or books!

Finally, Mike saw this sweet angel, otherwise known as a nurse, come to the door and say “Cameron!” and it’s at that very moment he THOUGHT he was saved and then they bring him to a room and tell him to strip the child so they can weigh her and take her temperature. You think to yourself, okay this must be what they do to check a hand infection…then, the next thing you know, the nurse takes off and leaves him hanging with a cold baby and NO TOYS or BOOKS at all! They say something crazy and ridiculous like “the doctor will be right in”. It’s now 10:47 and her appointment was scheduled for 10:10. Again, so much for being early. Finally, after twenty more minutes, and a frozen child the doctor comes in…she spends a total of 6 minutes in the room. Yup, it’s an infection! They had to numb her hand and remove a splinter, that from what I heard, was bigger than Mike had ever seen before. My girl is so tough, did she cry you ask? yes, she did, but still really, what a trooper! Then, they gave her a prescription for her out of control eczema which I had been asking to get for the past 9 months! If I knew that he could get that out of the doctor, I would have sent Michael down there with her 9 months ago! Here’s a pic of her war scar from the doctor, just in case you though we were exaggerating over a splinter!


Did I mention after this visit was over, Cameron slept like a rock! I mean she fell asleep in her car seat and dad got her out, carried her upstairs, put her into her crib and she never budged! She was wiped out, but wouldn’t you be after that trauma…and to think we never got the call that we won the $10,000 from America’s Funniest Video!

BLAHHHH!

Life has been so busy…I feel like it’s just passing me by! Anyway, sorry no updates lately, but hang on tight, there is so much more to come! I’m just hanging with the kids more often these days, and the weather is nice (at least as of lately), therefore we are outside more often. Anyway, I’m alive but busy and will get back on this posting thing soon! Have a great night…who knew I’d love Wednesday night tv so much?